I shouldn't have posted
My evolving feelings about the prospect of having another child are sadly irrelevant now.My wife and daughter had embarked on their aformentioned trip to the homeland on Friday. They landed early Saturday morning and called me to say that everything was fine. Our daughter slept for only 2 hours of the 13 hour trip, but was well behaved as usual.
The trouble began the very next morning. She called to tell me the news, and I will spare the details, but we were clearly at risk of losing, or having already lost the baby.
For second time in my life, she was at risk of losing our child and I was thousands of miles away with no ability to do anything about it. I could not help her, care for her, or take her to the doctor.
The situation is difficult enough without having to deal with it through a phone line, ...with her going through all of the drama on her own and then reporting back to me.
By that evening she had seen the first of several doctors, and while they could not confirm anything at that time, both her and I were 90% sure we had already lost the baby.
This morning she called and confirmed, "I'm not pregnant anymore."
And so our momentary happiness is shattered, ...along with the plans and expectations we embarked on.
I will not get a chance to see her or hold her or comfort her for another 10 days, and I'm sure that none of the healing will begin until that happens.
And then we will try again.
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