The Frogurt Is Also Cursed

WOW.

Check this out.

11:55 AM

What is The Procedure for Forfeiting?

You gotta feel for Shermy a little bit. I mean, he still makes idiot moves, like putting in Rashard Lee to run back kickoffs, or going away from the pass for the bulk of the 3rd and fourth quarters, but there is really no way for him to force these foot-fisted stiffs to hang onto the cock-sucking ball.

The look on Shermy's face was pretty hilarious, ...I've never actually seen someone so mad that their forhead split in half and peeled away revealing twin demon-headed snakes that shot forth breathing fire and barking with the pleading agony of a thousand condemned souls, ...but there it was.

But we shouldn't feel too sorry for him, after all, he's slowly dissolving in the stomache-acid bath of his own making.

You know what I'd like to see, ...a concerted effort to adjust to the dismal situation we find ourselves in. For example, how about some suprise plays? We can't beat teams straight up, so why not try to fool 'em?

And I don't mean that you should fake every punt, but why not the halfback option pass, a few more misdirection halfback tosses, a flea-flicker, a no-huddle series, a QB draw, starting a series with 4 wides, etc.

Our line can't make holes for Gado, so why not toss him the ball (like on the TD run) so that he can start the run outside of the d-line instead of forcing him to run through it?

These strategies aren't meant to be the sum total of our offense, but if it gets us one more first down, or gets us closer to field goal range, or actually pays off and gets us in the end zone, ...then we are more likely to start winning these 3 and 5 point games instead of losing them.

But, you know, I'm just looking at history and drawing reasonable conclusions. My bad.

As it is now, ...we're stuck repeating the same mistakes over and over thanks to the Packers patented "automatic choke/suck", which runs on intervals of 5 minutes and kicks in automatically on 3rd down.

We should at least try something new so we can start making new mistakes. This is getting beyond throw-your-remote-frustrating, it's becoming stab-yourself-with-a-butter-knife boring.

I'm presently considering two things:

1. Demonstrating how predictable the Packers are by posting the script of the game before kick off next week.
2. Ceasing to think about the Packers for the next six days, then deliberately not watching the game on Sunday.

Number 1 could be fun, but number 2 intrigues me.

I wonder what that would be like?

9:51 PM

Have a Good Turkey Day

I leave you with this.

9:47 PM

Oh, How We Miss Him

We miss him BADLY.

Some choice cuts:

" It's got to be tough when everyone else is playing with aces, kings, queens and jacks and you're playing with 10s on down. It's tough."
...
"They're playing with guys who are NFL Europe-caliber. It just doesn't work."
...
"This is the big leagues. It's not Aunt Fannie's Taffy Pull. You have to play big-league players. They don't have a running back. Maybe that kid (Samkon Gado) had an off night, but those other two guys (Tony Fisher and ReShard Lee) are NFL Europe players."

Well, who can disagree with that? Aunt Fannie's Taffy Pull?

Wolf did not blame Thompson, the man he recommended to replace Sherman for the GM position, for the Packers' predicament. He said the number of injuries the Packers have suffered on offense is simply more than one team can protect itself against.

I've no love for Ted Thompson, but I mostly agree here as well. No one really thought we were in serious need of offensive talent. In fact, had Thompson picked up some running backs and receivers, we'd all have screamed because what they really needed was defensive help. That was the main focus of fans this past off-season. Getting defensive help. And it turns out that we're doing OK on defense. We need backfield help, but we're not losing games because of the defense.

Where I disagree is in letting Wahle and Rivera go. They could have used franchise tags and transition tags on at least one of them and kept them around. He didn't. A perfect sign of a rebuilding team.

We've sorely missed Wolf's short temper and clever phrasings. We've missed his calculated misinformation and his occasional candor.

Most of all, we've sorely missed his stewardship of this team.

It was a big drop from Wolf to Sherman. I think we all realize now how steep it really was.

King Kong didn't fall as far.

9:54 PM

Absolutely Disgusting

How familiar ...

Penalties, dropped passes, an inability to adjust a defense, and one huge blown coverage.

Just like EIGHT other games in this TEN game season, the Packers hung themselves with mistake after mistake after mistake.

The key mistake(s)?

Early in the third quarter they get a turnover in Vikings territory. They get 15 yards worth of penalites to create a 3rd and long and don't convert. The Vikings get the ball back and drive for a touchdown. Sound familiar?

The entire second half was about Packer receivers dropping passes, many that would have been first downs, causing a glut of 3-and-outs. Sound familiar?

On their last possession, Thurman and Chatman dropped enough passes in key situations to get themselves benched on any other team. The final insult was a dropped pass that would have been a first down around the Vikings 10 yard line. Instead of having a chance to run some clock and score a TD, they were forced to kick a long field goal.

And I have a question for Mr. Bates.

How many times in a row does a team have to run the SAME type of play until you react to it? The Vikings ran approximately 793 straight running plays where the back bounced the play outside. The Packers didn't account for that at all.

In fact, the only time the Packers stopped the Vikings in the second half was when they blitzed on third and long. The ONLY time. You'd think that if you failed over and over again, and then tried something different that succeeded, you would, ...I don't know, ...repeat it?

Not the Packers. Why attempt to repeat success?

After all, it should be easy for them ...they have so much practice repeating their failures.

9:11 PM

I Hate These Games

I really do.

Even though I don't really expect the Packers to win (and even if they did their season is lost), I'm still nervous and anxious and tense.

I don't subscribe to the "lose your games to get a better draft position" line of thinking.

Some folks are going a little batty because Reggie Bush had a monster game last week.

I don't think Bush will be a standout running back in the NFL. He's too small and I haven't seen him break a tackle yet. His upside is that people can't put a hand on him.

Anyway, I don't think he's a sure bet, and even if he was I still wouldn't toss a season to get him.

6:10 PM

You Gado Love It

Samkon has a myspace page. Expect it to be overrun by cheeseheads anyday now.

From a fellow net-surfing-work-slacker

7:47 AM

The Realization of the Male Dream

When all robot wives are made to look like this, we will have reached the pinnacle of male society. A true paradise. I, for one, welcome this glorious and desperately needed age.

Until then however, most of us will have to be content with pictures.

3:09 PM

Cracks Me Up Every Time

Poor Ralph.

12:15 PM

Dog Day Afternoon

Yes, Mr. Frogurt is a withered 35 years old today.

Like last year, it's fun for me to see what else happened on this day. And it's interesting that many important hostorical events took place on 11/4.

A correction from last year, the occassion of Loretta Swit's birth has moved into the "evil" category based on her campaign to ban foie gras from Chicago restaurants. Dimwit.

Here's a few more events of this day:

In 1928 famous gambler, casino owner, crook, and fixer of the 1919 World Series where the Chicago White Sox and shoeless Joe disgraced baseball for all time was shot to death in a poker game in NYC.


In 1842, after a stormy three-year courtship marked by a broken engagement, Abraham Lincoln marries Lexington-born, hen-pecking, potato-throwing Mary Todd. Even the great ones make mistakes.

In 1948 T.S Eliot wins the Nobel Prize in literature. Coincidentally, I'm reading Murder in the Cathedral after finishing Some Clouds.

In 1978, Iranian troops fire on anti-Shah student protesters by Tehran University.

In 1939, the 1st air conditioned automobile (Packard) was exhibited in Chicago, Ill.

Here's a shocker: In 1924 Nellie Tayloe Ross was elected as 1st US female governor (Wyoming).

And finally, Art Carney was born in Mount Vernon NY in 1918.

11:46 AM

Legendary Moron

His friends referred to him in interviews this week as a "legendary moron". We all know him as the guy who ran onto the field and stole the ball from Brett Favre's hand.

Here's the full video of him getting mauled by security.

2:47 PM