Batman Review
As far as I know, this is the
first published review of Batman Begins.
In short, the reviewer (a Batman/comics fan) loved it.
As a life-long Batman nut myself, I have some concerns about the movie:
The costume, while cooler, looks a bit too dull in the previews and pictures.
Batman looks too short in some of the previews and pictures, but I'll have to see the movie to make a real decision on that one.
The costume looks quite advanced for a "year one" story line.
Why retell the Batman origin that everyone already knows?
It appears that they will try to infuse the Batman origin with mysticism. I've always liked him better as a brilliant, arrogant, obsessive detective/crusader.
Two weeks until the US release.
My Vote
Bo or Carrie?
Well, since the talented and scrumpious Nadia is not on the ballot, I'm going with Bo.
I think most folks with good taste will go for Bo, especially based on last night's performances.
Last night's show was actually pretty lame. Carrie totally sucked. She looked wooden, was screechily off-pitch, warbled, and basically buckled under the pressure. Yet, the judges essentially gave the nod to her and encouraged the audience to vote her in.
I know why. She's cuter than Bo and sings country/pop which sells a lot of CDs. Bo is 28 and looks like he's going on 36. He sings southern rock and his musical appeal is probably not that wide.
So, the judges crassly want the faceless but cuter and less talented contentant to win because it would be easier to sell her CDs. I think the audience still views this as a competition, and it is clear that Bo won based on performance, ability, talent, and showmanship.
In fact, I can't think of a category that Carrie won except for her ability to make a shitty song even more cocksucky.
Not that Bo was all Shannon Moon or anthing, but he was better than Carrie.
But neither are as good as Nadia.
Bail Organa's Hot as Hell Wife
If, like me, you swooned over the brief glimpses of Bail Organa's (Jimmy Smits') wife in Episode III, ...
here she is (scroll down to Rebecca Jackson Mendosa).
Who is she?
I guess she's an Austrialian pop-star who had/has a pop band with her
sister called
Jackson Mendosa.
An interesting tidbit
about her:
Rebecca hit the headlines in January 1999 when she suffered a stroke from massive blood loss after she was stabbed in the heart by her estranged husband Marlon Brand who committed suicide after the attack.
Revenge of the Sith Reveiw
Extremely powerful, but ...
The bottom line on this movie is that 85% of the movie is extremely powerful, emotional, dark, engrossing, tense, and dizzyingly exciting.
Then there's another 10% of the movie that I call "quibblish". There are lots of plot, dialog, and character choices that EASILY could have been done 7000 times better. I'll have some examples later.
But the difficult part about this movie is the last 5% that I call the "what the fuck was that fat shithead Lucas thinking?" parts. Unfortunately, this 5% makes up the last 5-7 minutes of the movie, and leaves you very underwhelmed. Imagine throwing a 1 hit shutout into the ninth, then to hit three batters in a row, then throw a wild pitch, and then walk a batter to score the losing run. That's what this movie is like.
First, the good 85%.
The acting and dialog are much improved over the last two movies. The characters finally look comfortable in their roles, especially Hayden Christiansen. In this movie I think he's a great pre-Vader villian. The brooding and moodiness that others complain about seem right to me. He's wild and brash and ruthless, and a great contrast to Ewan McGreggor.
The pace is rather relentless. Don't expect to find a place to take a potty break. I sat on the aisle last night, and in our packed theatre, maybe 3 or 4 people stepped out for refreshments. Everyone else was glued to their seat. The movie sails along as critical events topple like dominos, it's a bit overwhelming at times. It all happens so fast.
Yoda kicks ass in this movie.
Palpatine is a slitherly serpent. You actually feel your skin crawl as he manipulates Anikan with his perverted deception.
But this is really a movie that is the sum of its parts. The music, the lighting, and the events themselves smother you with their dark tragedy. Yes, you
feel the terror and sadness. You
feel discomfort at the violence (the body count is shockingly high). The movie moved me. It is a powerful film.
But ...
There were parts of this movie (10%) that a 7 year old could have written better. Mostly, I feel these are minor gripes, because they do not detract from the power of the movie. They just annoy you. These facts sit in your head and force you to suspend reason, logic, taste, memory, and common sense to get past it. For example:
The droids. R2 plays a noticable role, 3PO does not. In fact, they could have been removed from the movie altogether and the movie would have lost nothing. There was no reason for them to be there. In fact, they detracted from the movie because you have to wonder why Darth Vader does not recognise 3PO in the later episodes since a)he created 3PO, b)3PO is the personal assistant of his beloved wife, and c)3PO seems to be there at every important event in his life.
Why is Chewbacca in this movie? He has like two lines and no one ever explains what it is he says. He's in the movie for a whole 20 seconds and we are treated to Yoda saying goodbye to Chewy, "Chewbacca, miss you, I shall." Yet, Yoda does not mention this in Empire or Jedi where Chewbacca is a main character.
Why do they make Yoda talk backwards ALL THE FUCKING TIME. I mean, he didn't constantly talk like that in Empire. It gets really annoying and silly.
Anikan's transformation happens too fast. One minute he turns in Palpatine, the next he helps him defeat Windu, then he regrets doing it, then he instantly pledges allegiance to Palpatine. Too big of a change too fast.
In fact, many significant moments went by too fast.
How can Jedis move large objects with their mind and can jump and fly for short distances, but cannot use these powers when hanging from a ledge?
R2 can fly now?
Obi-Wan complains about R2, and it seems to be an on-going argument between him and Anikan, yet he doesn't remember R2 in episodes 4-6. And while we're talking about Obi-Wan, how does he age 40 years in the span of 20 years?
The seperatist army is holding up in Mustafa (or some such name). Why would they be on this planet since it appears to be about 10 minutes from Couresant?
Why is Obi-Wan riding an iguana?
I could go on.
As you can see, these are quibbles. The real problem with the movie is the end.
First, they put Darth Vader together really fast, like he was a pre-fab kit or something. Also, with all this advanced technology, this universe doesn't have anesthetic or ultrasounds? Also, when they finally have all the clothes and armor on Anikan, he looks like a little kid wearing a Halloween Vader costume. He's swimming in that thing.
Second, the scene where Vader is assembled, told of death of Padme, and breaks from his restraints is entirely laughable. It looked like an SNL parody of a bad knock-off of a 1940's Frankenstein. It is probably one of the worst movie scenes I've ever seen in my life. It is possibly unforgivable that this scene made it into the final product. Didn't anyone edit this thing?
Third, why does Padme die? There are about 10,000 really good ways to write her death, Lucas chose none of them.
Fourth, why does Yoda go into seclusion so quick? He almost beat the Emperor and is apparantly stronger than the Emperor. Why not try again?
If Qui-Gon can come back as a ghost, why isn't he in the episodes 4-6?
So, I give it 3.5 stars out of 5. If they had cut some of those scenes at the end, I would be giving it a 4 or 4.5.
The good parts are THAT GOOD. Unfortunately, the bad parts live up to their billing as well.
Sith '08
If you bumped into Lucas at the local deli, would you:
A) Cock-punch him
B) Hug him and say "Thanks"
C) Dance a little jig and hum the cantina song until he left
D) Give him your script for a porn-flick starring
Aayla the jedi and yourself as a confused but well-endowed droid.
I don't remember the first time I saw Star Wars, but it was shortly after it debuted in theaters in '77. I was 6.
My first memory of the movie involves attending second grade and seeing the other students playing with Star Wars figures, talking about the movie, drawing pictures of the Millenium Falcon, and cutting out the pictures from the packaging their Star Wars figures came in.
I remember a conversation where some kids were talking about when the sandpeople knocked down 3PO and how cool that was. I remember thinking that it was an odd part of the movie to recall, they were so many other great moments, like Vader force-choking that dude in the Death Star Operations board meeting. "I find your lack of faith disturbing."
I'll admit it, even then I thought Vader was cool, ...and a bit scary (he did scare me as a child). But my favorite characters, I'll admit it, were the droids. 3PO had the best lines.
So, like seemingly all children alive at the time, I was a Star Wars nut. I saw the movie repeatedly in the theaters, and listened to the album nightly. Yes, the album.
Not the soundtrack, mind you. But the album that contained a shortened version of the movie in audio form. All the scenes with dialog were represented and it told the entire story faithfully. I listened to that thing every night as I fell asleep. In the morning the needle would still be bouncing on the inner record label.
On the Star Wars fan scale, 0 being someone who doesn't know who Obi-Wan Kenobi is and 10 being someone who can identify the parents of Bail Organa, ...I'm a 7.
Tonight I'll be viewing episode III and I'll post my thoughts on the movie here later, but I wanted to say that since the prequels came out I think most fans would opt for option A in my quiz above, but wouldn't feel good about it.
We're conflicted.
It's AMAZING what he has accomplished. Truly amazing. The Star Wars universe is enormous and still growing, and it all came from him. He's created a movie reality that has captured generations of hearts and minds, revolutionized movie making, marketing, and technology. He created a saga that we care about. And because we care, we have to say
but ...
So much more could have been done this time around. What he got so right before, he got so wrong today. He didn't learn from his Ewok mistake or his Empire success.
In these movies he is re-exerting his will and control on a universe that no longer consists of just him and his imagination.
All of our imaginations are now involved, and we take exception to his seemlingly calculated decisions. In seeing interviews with him on this newest film, he has repeated that things are being done the way "he wants" and the story is being finished to suit "his vision".
The only problem is that his vision is not (and never was) as good as his ideas.
An "idea man" he is. A storyteller, a writer, he is not.
The person behind the camera in these films should have been more concerned with "what will work" than "what I want to see".
My greatest hope is that he lets someone else direct and write the next three movies (I hope they are made). I hope Lucas is the Executive Producer, I hope he oversees the special effects, I even hope he lays out the initial script, and I hope he does not pen a single word that makes it into the actual films.
Incidentally, I choose option D from my quiz above. Seriously, have you seen that chick? Wow.
My New Hero
Turning the tables on the opposite sex.
Godfather Video Game - Hands on by Kotaku
My favorite game site,
Kotaku, got a chance to play the upcoming
Godfather video game.
He only drops one screen shot on us, but describes the basics if the game pretty well. It looks quite promising, but it looks like it really doesn't have much to do with the Godfather stories. It's just sorta placed in the "universe".
The next twelve months should bring us video games based on The Godfather, Scarface, and The Sopranos, which just goes to show how much the 2002 Mafia: The City of Lost Heaven game was ahead of its time.
Also, I've recently read some rumors that Mafia 2 will be set in a Sopranos-like setting.
