The Frogurt Is Also Cursed

What Could Have Happened

Friends will know why this story is meaningful.

I've always thought we were fortunate to never get caught while doing the stupid things we did when we were younger. We were also fortunate we didn't get hurt.

7:40 AM

For the Non-Believers

For those of you who think my previous post Priceless was unfairly lumping in all democrats because of the views of one dumb chick, ...check this out.

Hilary Clinton basically said the same thing this week in San Francisco.

Headlining an appearance with other Democratic women senators on behalf of Sen. Barbara Boxer, who is up for re-election this year, Hillary Clinton told several hundred supporters -- some of whom had ponied up as much as $10,000 to attend -- to expect to lose some of the tax cuts passed by President Bush if Democrats win the White House and control of Congress.

"Many of you are well enough off that ... the tax cuts may have helped you," Sen. Clinton said. "We're saying that for America to get back on track, we're probably going to cut that short and not give it to you. We're going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good."

It's not your money.

Not voting for Bush is the same as voting for this world view.

BTW - fat chance we will see any mention of this on the nightly news?

via Sully

1:06 PM

Beyond Idiocy

The 21st century Marx Brothers, the Green party, held a rally Sunday calling for an end to the Iraq war.

My first reaction to that statement was puzzlement. The war is basically over, we've now handed over control to the Iraqis, ...I wasn't sure what they meant. They couldn't actually mean that they want us to simply abandon Iraq ...?

Yep. They are calling for, "the immediate withdrawal of American troops from Iraq, saying it could be completed in five weeks."

So, why would they call for us to abandon Iraq? Concern for our troops? Nope. Here's why:

(the crowd) was dotted with protest puppets, caricatures of President Bush, Palestinian flags and signs with provocative language.

"These colors don't run the world," said one, with an image of the American flag.

Another called for "Victory to the Iraqi resistance."

I know what you're thinking, that's just one nut's opinion, right? Wrong. When given the chance to renounce that purely evil sentiment among his supporters, David Cobb, the Green party Presidential nominee refused, saying, he could not renounce the last sentiment because he didn't know exactly what it meant.

Telling, no?

8:47 PM

Priceless

Managed to get out for a few beers this weekend. A few of my buddies who are mostly politically independent (but voted for Bush in 2000) have been worn down by in the incessant negative coverage of Bush.

He's not a perfect candidate or perfect president, ...but he has:

Lowered all your taxes
Promised to lower them again
Won two wars against evil fascist Islamic forces (although Iraq is on-going)
Brought the economy back from a recession

Let's face it. The president will be either one of two people next year. If you don't vote for the candidate you are most likely to vote support, you are giving strength to the other side.

Kerry would do none of the things listed above. He's vocally against most of those things.

He's also against privatizing social security.

To see what kind of president he will be, check out this article that recounts Kerry refusing to cross a fake picket line.

Most of all, ...supporting Kerry is supporting people like this, recounted by Lileks:

A minor political note, if you're interested in such things. The other day a young girl came to the door to solicit my support for her presidential candidate. I asked her why I should vote for this man. She was very nice and earnest, but if you got her off the talking points she was utterly unprepared to argue anything, because she didn't know what she was talking about. She had bullet points, and she believed that any reasonable person would see the importance of these issues and naturally fall in line. But she could not support any of her assertions. Her final selling point: Kerry would roll back the tax cuts.

Then came the Parable of the Stairs, of course. My tiresome, shopworn, oft-told tale, a piece of unsupportable meaningless anecdotal drivel about how I turned my tax cut into a nice staircase that replaced a crumbling eyesore, hired a few people and injected money far and wide - from the guys who demolished the old stairs, the guys who built the new one, the family firm that sold the stone, the other firm that rented the Bobcats, the entrepreneur who fabricated the railings in his garage, and the guy who did the landscaping. Also the company that sold him the plants. And the light fixtures. It's called economic activity. What's more, home improvements added to the value of this pile, which mean that my assessment would increase, bumping up my property taxes. To say nothing of the general beautification of the neighborhood. Next year, if my taxes didn't shoot up, I had another project planned. Raise my taxes, and it won't happen, I won't hire anyone, and they won't hire anyone, rent anything, buy anything. You see?

"Well, it's a philosophical difference," she sniffed. She had pegged me as a form of life last seen clicking the leash off a dog at Abu Ghraib. "I think the money should have gone straight to those people instead of trickling down." Those last two words were said with an edge.

"But then I wouldn't have hired them," I said. "I wouldn't have new steps. And they wouldn't have done anything to get the money."

"Well, what did you do?" she snapped.

"What do you mean?"

"Why should the government have given you the money in the first place?"

"They didn't give it to me. They just took less of my money."

That was the last straw. Now she was angry. And the truth came out:

"Well, why is it your money? I think it should be their money."

Then she left.

And walked down the stairs. I let her go without charging a toll. It's the philanthropist in me.

7:09 AM

Amen. Buy a Coors tonight!

One of the Coor's kids is running for the senate and is speaking out against the 21 year old drinking age.

I agree.

He's a Republican, btw, but don't expect this position to get much support from either side of the aisle.

via the professor

12:22 PM

I Forgot

I few weeks ago I heard an interesting tid-bit on Steve "the Homer" True's sports talk show.

He was talking with his Packer expert about McKenzie and Hunt and the expert (whose name I foget) started talking about what he thought was wrong the players and Sherman.

Now, I've long felt that Sherman can't handle both jobs (GM and coach). He's an ok coach, good, maybe even very good, but he's yet to have a great draft and yet to put together any good trades or pick up any great players as a steal. Grady Jackson is his sole accomplishment, ...and Grady fell into his lap.

The Homer's expert sort of suggested that the players are losing respect for Sherman. He's losing the players due to his attitude and actions. He spends little time in the clubhouse (because he has other duties), and since last season's frustrating exit he's pushed the players harder than usual.

Here's the interesting part. The expert mentioned the Philly game in the playoffs last year. It's one of the hardest games I've ever had to get over. After going for it on 4th and goal in the first half and failing to convert (Green tripped over his lineman's leg), he stated (in the locker room at halftime):

"If we get another shot at it, we're going for it, and we're going to make it."

Sports fans will remember that they did get another chance at the end of the game to go for it and seal the victory.

Sherman blinked.

They punted.

Into the end zone.

And eventually lost the game.

Now, you can still say it was the right move to make since they forced Philly into a 4th and 26, ...but it is my feeling that he let his players down.

He told them they weren't backing down, that they were going for it, ...then backed out on them.

It's one of the reasons he is losing his players. He needs to give up the GM position and rebuild his relations with his players.

12:03 PM

Relief Pitchers, Defensive Backs, and ...

Democrats. They all have very short memories.

Gore this week: Bush lied. No link between Iraq and al qaida.

Clinton/Gore Administration: "...al Qaeda reached an understanding with the government of Iraq that al Qaeda would not work against that government and that on particular projects, specifically including weapons development, al Qaeda would work cooperatively with the government of Iraq."

Authentic Intelligence Reports: Bin laden asked for Saddam's help fighting foreign forces (the USA) in Saudi Arabia.

11:44 AM

Wonkette on Fire

If she and I weren't married (to other people), I'd marry this women. Well, I'd try to.

7:55 PM

Lesson #2

When the wife is complaining about how her mother is indecisive, takes forever to get ready, refuses to make decisions by always saying "whichever is easier for you", doesn't listen attentively if she is not interested in the topic or tv show (then asks a lot of questions about what is going on) ...do NOT comment about how she shares these traits with her mother.

Furthermore, when the wife complains that her mother is annoying her by not automatically doing what the wife wants her to do, do NOT suggest that better (or any) communication from the wife might be required.

Lesson #2 of married life is: Truth, honesty, and common sense can only get you in trouble with the wife. What is true is what they "think". What is honest is what they "want to hear". What is sensible is "what they have already done".

Good advice.

To recap, Lesson #1 was: In times of stress, a beer is more theraputic and helpful than introspection, therapy, or communication.

9:10 AM

Mothers and Daughters on Father's Day

The wife has unresolved childhood issues with her mother.

Her parents were divorced when she was about 11 and her sister was 8. It was the mother's fault. A betrayal.

When it all hit the fan, the wife briefly covered for her mother, not really knowing what was going on. For this, she has been eternally guilt-ridden. What else is an 11 year old girl to do when she is alone, afraid, and unsure where her mother is, ...only marginally understanding what was really going on? What else was she to say when her father asked over the phone to speak with her mother who was absent?

"She's in the shower."

And a lifetime of self-criticism begins.

She apparently had much closer contact with her mother over the years, ...living with her or near her. At 18 her mother moved out with her new boyfriend and left the wife to take care of her sister in the house alone.

The mother came over everyday, ...but it couldn't be the same. At 18 the wife had to raise a teenager, ...cook, clean, and comfort her sister.

In many ways they were better for it. Both of them are now beautiful, strong, independent, and responsible people.

Add resentful to that list.

Decades later the mother is visiting the daughter and her husband in the US. The daughter is watching divorce court and translating for her mother. One person is divorcing another because of infidelity.

The mother makes an ill-advised comment about how "mistakes" happen, it happens to "everyone", it's "no big deal", and you should not break up a family over it. The words were delivered as if they were a sermon out of the "good book". You could almost hear the book snapping shut as an exclamation point.

The daughter bites her tongue.

The break down happens later while relaying the conversation to her husband.

23 years of tears soak into my chest as my newborn daughter sleeps silently nearby.

Remind to never cheat and never get divorced.

4:14 PM

Wedding in the Weeds

The wedding I attended this past weekend featured an x-girlfriend hitching up with a new guy in an outdoor, non-religious ceremony. I have no hang-ups with this girl, ...the torch was held by her, not me. We were friends and I decided that friends who slept together were better than friends who merely talked.

Big mistake.

Lovers aren't friends and friends aren't lovers.

People who say that the best marriages are between couples who are best friends will likely never experience true love. Or, they will never really be sure.

Yes, it's easy to get along with friends, that's why they are friends. Love is a completely different animal. Sometimes love is hard, irreconcilable, fiery hot, and unpredictable.

Seeking a friend for a mate is giving up on the experiment of love.

I believe that two lovers can never be anything but lovers. They can't be friends because that sort of non-intimacy would drive them crazy. If you can picture yourself and your mate as friends, ...you ain't in love.

Anyway, I refer to the x's new husband as a "new guy" because he kinda came out of nowhere. I guess they met last fall. I know he was pursuing her a bit, but I didn't think she was all that interested. Eventually, I guess she said "yes" to a date. I saw them a month or so later walking down Brady street hand-in-hand.

About a month or so later she said she was getting married. He asked, she said yes. That simple.

He seems nice, very nice actually, but a little strange. I guess it's because I've never seen any emotion out of him accept for silent, smiling, happiness. He's never looked irritated, tired, or relaxed (certainly not). Maybe he's just a happy, goofy guy. I hope so. They would be great together if that is the case.

The wedding was a cute 5 minute service amongst a handful of pine trees. The sky was totally blue, the weather was nice, the crowd was large and pleasant, ...but the expression on the bride's face was priceless.

She was obviously stressed, and she doesn't handle stress well. Her personality leads her to want to hide and get away from everybody if she's feeling a little down or overwhelmed. She doesn't like crowds or lots of attention, ...needless to say she wasn't smiling or blushing.

Her look was part fear, part "whatever". I think she was trying to mask her anxiety by looking casual, but she also masked her smile. The groom, after being giddy and bouncy all day was stiff as a board and apparently sweating. He looked nervous and terrified, ...happily terrified.

They said the "I do's", we all had champaign, the last guy holding a torch for her receded into the crowd, and we basically spent a nice afternoon in the park.

After the ceremony, the bride removed her pink dress and put on her jeans. It seemed she couldn't get out of it fast enough. She began to relax a little, but still didn't seem to be overly gushing with happiness.

It made me wonder.

3:46 PM

The First Day

"First" and "last day" phrases are great literary devices. The "last day of June", the "first day of summer", ...they instantly bring images and memories to any reader's mind. It's like free logic or http fastpaths ...

Anyway, today is the first day of summer, ...which of course means that yesterday was the last day of spring. For those of you not familiar with the midwest, I will inform you that mentioning spring to a midwesterner is sure to evoke derisive laughter. Don't feel bad, they are not laughing at you, it just a natural reaction to having seen baseball games called on the count of SNOW, from having worn jackets in June, and not being able to air out the house until Memorial day!

Yeah, we don't get much spring up here. A few days here and there will tease you from March to May, ...but don't expect short sleeve weather until June. And even then it is risky.

Still, I'm always happy to see Spring come because I'm always hoping that this will be the year that we get to thaw out early, but my hopes are always dashed at the foot of my furnace. For this reason I am always ecstatic to see spring go away. Finally, FINALLY, we can rest assured that the warm weather is here for the time being.

This year I have other reasons for being happy about turning the page on a season, ...

I'm taking an online Visual Basic class at MATC. It started last week and I registered for the class the week before. Despite this, I was unable to log in and look at any of my class materials until Thursday of last week. This meant I could not even find out what book I was supposed to get. I got the book on Thursday, took all night Thursday installing, which only gave me 3 days to read 3 chapters and complete two sections of exercises.

Normally, this would not be a big deal, but the mother-in law is in town this weekend and I got a suprise Tuesday deadline for one of my work projects. On top of this, Sunday was Father's day and we were supposed to go to my sister's for lunch, I promised to take the in-laws shopping in the morning, and Saturday I had a wedding to go to all day.

Short story ...I worked Saturday morning, Saturday night, Sunday night until 12:30, and woke up at 3:15 Monday morning to finish up.

More later on seeing an x-girlfriend get married, why 2 women need 3.5 hours to get ready to go shopping, why daughters can't stand their mothers, and what NOT to say to your wife when she's complaining about her mother ...

11:58 AM

Friday Roundup

Brewers: Don't wanna jinx it.

Tim Couch: I still favored Kerry Collins. Couch showed himself to be thin-skinned and to have very little mental toughness (if any at all). I mean, the Cleveland fans made him cry! Still, he's a better backup than Peterson (I think). I don't buy any of this "taking over as QB after Favre leaves" talk. If they're serious about that, jeebus help us all.

Baby Good: I can now see why people love babies. They are a lot of fun. They smell cute, sound cute, act cute, and sleep cute. Even the wife is talking about having another, a position I initially supported, but have re-considered due to dwindling finances.

Baby Bad: In addition to the mounting financial costs of child-rearing, there are other downsides. They are time burglers, slowly and insatiably eating away at your days. Lots of things that dad likes get unbought when a new baby comes.

Still: Some dad things will be bought. Wilco's new CD is a must. The Simpson's 4th season DVD set will be bought eventually. And this video card will eventually find it's way to my home. And ...I bought a new shirt today at Banana Republic.

2:34 PM

Back to the World

Hi everyone, ...anything happen the last week and a half? If it did, I probably didn't hear about it.

As you know, I've been promoted to Dad status. WND has been promoted to my old position, "Dork". Baby will be filling in for WND as the household "Cutie".

The wife is sawing serious wood next to me, ...the marque says the next feeding is at 1:30am so I've finally got some time to kill.

While I'd like to rehash the baby's suprise entrance here, I just don't have the energy. I've been away from work for 10 days and I haven't had a single day of rest. What's worse, I haven't had a single night of good, solid slumber either.

Baby came early, so our remodeling and redecorating was only about 40% done when she arrived. I go back to work tomorrow and I'm about as done as I'll ever be, ...so I'll be exercising one of my very best skills, walking away.

Babies really are a lot of work. It's not difficult or dangerous or overwhelming work, ...it's just enough to keep you in a constant state of fret. Kind of like a Christmas tree. You chop it down and stick it into a bowl of water to keep it in suspended animation just long enough to open presents and stuff your face. Babies keep your house one step away from clean, your energy level one step away from exhausted, your time one step away from being late, and your life one step away from total disorganization. Parenthood is being chopped off at the knees, stuck in a bowl of water and suspended in that state for 18 years.

But that's not all. You are not only a parent, you are a father. And fatherhood has it's own set of issues. You now worry about the cost of milk, the tightness of your car seat, the lead paint in your house. You worry that every gasp out of your sleeping baby's mouth could be her last, that every mosquito that penetrates your home's exterior could be the one to give her the west nile virus, that the staircase to your front door is a deathtrap.

In the first days of fatherhood, I could not put Baby down for more that 30 seconds without checking her to make sure she was still on her back and still breathing. For her first few nights, I held her all night, afraid to lay her down. I've gotten over that, but I still check her whenever I can, tickling her cheek just to see her facial expression change. It's a grim watch, I know.

After being born incredibly small, she's taken to eating and belching like George Wendt. Conssequently, she's growing fast and her baby clothes almost fit her now.

She's more alert now than last week. She can look at me for extended moments, and can even smile at me. It's during those moments that it hits me. I'm it. I'm the rock, the provider, the problem solver. I'm the one who must have all the answers. I'm the one who is supposed to "make it better".

To her, I'm the lifegaurd. To me, I'm the kid hanging on the side of the pool, too afraid to go in the center.

I'm the same guy who did all those stupid things, ...lighting bottle rockets out the window of my own moving car (almost blowing the heads off of my two friends in the back seat when I released the rocket too early), drinking 13 whisky sours in 2 hours, joining a rock band at the age of 31. You get the picture.

I don't feel like I've changed, but I must have, ...because I would not do those things again. I still think about new cars, computer upgrades, video games, beer, ...but I don't act upon those feelings.

Thankless restraint. The MO of the father.

9:49 PM

Cruise Control

Life as I had previously enjoyed it quietly melted and dripped away last Thursday night, barely attracting notice. There was no crescendo, no ironic twist, no standing O. Just an unprepared, worried guy sitting next to a bed, watching nurses come and go, eating graham crackers, and trying not to fall asleep while the wife's discomfort was growing.

Labor was induced around 3pm, quickly introducing pain in clock-like intervals. By 6pm she was not much more dilated than she had been that morning. We began to accept that it would be a long, long night.

Sometime just before 9pm they put in the epidural as she was nearing 3cm dilated. The epidural worked on only one side, so they flipped her over and gave her a larger dose. We waited for that to work, and both drifted off for catnaps. We woke around 10:30 because the nurse said she was going to flip her over again at 1 and check her progress.

The nurse checked her for about 2 seconds and said, "We'd better call Dr. C, your baby is ready."
"What?" I said.
"Her head is right here, want to feel it?"
"Uhh, no. So, she's fully dilated?"
"Yep."

From that point on we had to actually go very slow to give the doctor enough time to get to the hospital. Dr. C arrived just in time, and at 11:05pm our new baby popped out with minimal effort. The wife felt nothing. The epidural worked so well that she had dilated from 3-10cm while she was sleeping!

The wife and I were both completely shocked that it had happened so fast and so easily. We'd taken the birthing class to prepare us for hours and hours of pain. We'd learned massage techniques, breathing techniques, body positioning, ...but needed none of it.

We'd watched the pregnancy shows on TLC and Discovery Health with a lot of concern, ...the pain, the numerous risks, the long hours, ...but we were lucky.

8:55 AM

Mission Accomplished

Baby safely landed on the shores of her parent's welcoming arms last night.

Thank jeebus for small (very small) miracles.

2:58 PM

The News

The news was not good.

We went in early for a Non Stress Test (NST) that went well. After 30 minutes they moved us over to the ultrasound room where we quickly got the bad news.

While she was up on the examining table I thought her stomache looked bigger, but the ultrasound readings contradicted that. Very quickly the doctor realized the situation.

The baby hasn't grown in the two weeks since the last ultrasound. While the baby continues to have a good heart rate and good movement, the doctors feel that the baby would be better off outside the womb at this point.

Our OB is off in Alaska on vacation and won't be back until Sunday night. We had thought that we would be able to wait until Monday to deliver, but the ultrasound specialist suggested we have the baby today.

So, there I am in a darkened room where the only light is coming off of a tv screen that shows us images from the ultrasound. All I can see is monochrome bubbles and shadows. The doctor pulls out a graf showing the baby's growth over the past two weeks and how it relates to normal growth. He tells us to pay attention to the blue line as it represents our baby. That line veers off from the other lines about 5 weeks ago and keeps fading further south.

While he consults the doctor that is sitting in for our OB, doctor C, we are sent up to her office to meet her. Doctor C has a really interesting name suggesting some sort of East Indian/East Asian ancestry. We sit in her tiny office and wait.

I try hard to judge what the wife is feeling, ...she seems to have a general sense that the doctors are overreacting. She wants to believe everything is ok. Also, we are woefully unprepared to deliver today. The nursery is not finished, the wife's moving boxes are not put away, we don't have a mattress for the crib, and we don't have a bag packed for the hospital. It would be hard to come up with two people less prepared to have a child today.

After a short time doctor C walks in. She's about 5' 3", long dark hair, dark skin, and hot. I mean really hot. I was right, she is some sort of asian, ...my guess is Burmese or Thai.

Wiping up my drool, I listen to what she has to say, ...the short version: baby's gotta come out today.

She sends us over to the birthing center where we check in. The wife disrobes, puts on the hospital gown, and gets an IV stuck in. We answer a lot of questions, make a list of supplies we need, and wait. They don't have a delivery room ready for her, so she must sit in one of the regular rooms until one opens up. While we wait, I head home to feed WND, get supplies, and notify work that I will not be able to finish the 9195 tasks I have on my plate.

I feel sorry for my co-workers.

None of this pretext seems important now. Yes, I ran around trying to gather everything I needed for the birth, forgetting many things, sweating, running, swearing at traffic. But we are here now in the delivery room.

They try to make the delivery rooms look as much like a normal household room as they can, but the cables, fixtures, lights, and strangely configured outlets give it away. The wife called her mother and father, waking them up at about 6am their time. She cried a little after they examined her, but she is doing remarkably well. She's mostly worried about the pain. It's been her biggest concern all along. She's a real wimp when it comes to pain, so I'm a little concerned about how she will handle it.

They just hooked her IV up to some Pitocin to help move the contractions along. Everything is quiet here. It's daylight out, about 4:45pm, barely a cloud in the sky. All the lights in the room are off, so it's comfortably dim. The only sounds are the air conditioning and the soft beating of our baby's heart through the monitor.

The wife is reading a book and I am writing this.

When you are young and playing hide and seek with your friends, you cover your eyes, turn away, and count to a designated number. When you are finished, you turn and warn all of your friends, that no matter what their current state is, "Ready or not! Here I come!"

Well, we are not ready, but that doesn't really matter. We don't even have a name picked out, but that doesn't matter either. I've got lots of work to do, lots of deadlines, lots of time. I've got lots of time before I feel that I "must" have a baby. There is no biological clock keeping me awake at night with it's incessant ticking. I could spend a few years overseas, change careers, buy a sports car, do anything I wanted. I have not brought myself to this juncture by need or design. As a random piece output from a grand machine, my destination is not physically predestined.

And none of that matters.

As a child I spent most of my time playing out fantasies in my mind (I still do today, however my childhood fantasies did not involve the bassist from Hole, Miko Lee, and Miwa Oshira). I'd construct elaborate plotlines of war and revenge and adventure. Each day I'd replay the same exact fantasy, but make small corrections along the way. Each day I would edit my story, shaping it into something I would not be embarrased to share.

Life has no editing feature. It is a constantly moving vehicle. But if I could, would I? Would I steer myself onto another path?

You all know the answer is no. I guess I knew it too, but I kept writing these sentences to see what would come out on the other side.

Time to pick out a name, start timing contractions, and prepare myself for what is sure to be a long night.

Ready or not.

2:57 PM

We Find Out Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the big day.

We'll roll into the hospital around 8:30 and my wife will submit her abdomen for another ultrasound.

In the past two weeks the wife has barely gained any weight, which means the baby is also not gaining weight. Perhaps if all of her minimal weight gain is due to the baby's growth, then everything will be ok. If not, the doctors will suggest inducing labor right away.

Our OB is on vacation until Sunday night, so it's likely they will delay the birth until then, unless a delay may harm the baby.

I've got approximately 9657 things to take care of at work, but it's hard to concentrate sufficiently on the location of error logs, batch parameters, and XML syntax errors.

If I could, I'd partition my brain to work within small, rigidly defined parameters. 6am to 8am I'd operate in cooking/cleaning mode. 9am to 6pm I'd operate in geekdom/whistlewhileyouwork mode. 7pm to 11pm I'd be in cook/clean/paint/built/buy mode.

But my mind is a spilled box of legos, ...paralysis by plastic.

One of the things they (the pregnancy experts at the hospital) told us we needed to do was to find a pediatrician. When I was a kid my doctor was the best. Dr. Atkinson. A tall, handsome, awkwardly funny Swedish guy. His face looked like Harrison Ford, his hair was thin and graying-blonde. He had that stuttering, self-effacing comic style where he would tell a joke, pause, smile, and then everyone else would get it and laugh. I completely trusted him, which made our visits that much nicer. I didn't dread going to see him, I liked his jokes, and that made me an easy patient.

I saw him from birth to about 14 when we switched health plans and I went into one of those all-encompassing clinics. My second doctor was a real riot. A joke a minute, that guy. Saw him only twice. I had two more doctors before my latest one. Each was nice when we first met, then seemed put-out by my questions and visits. Each seemed like they had better things to do than tend to me.

Dr. Pierre is my new doctor. He's confident, smart, and listens to my problems. He's also really easy to deal with.

Anyway, I've got to pick pediatrician, so I go to the website and look at all the doctors at the hospital. I narrow the choice to 3 doctors. 1 is the chief of pediatrics. I nix her because she will probably have the least amount of time for my daughter. Another is a matronly, grandmother-type. I nix her because she is probably not up to date with modern treatments. Another is very young, probably younger than me. I choose her because she's been a practicing pediatrician for 4 years, so she's not completely new and not behind-the-times either.

I call to see if she is accepting patients. She is. They transfer me to "scheduling". They ask for the patient's last name, I tell them. They ask for the first name.

"Uh, we haven't decided on a first name yet."
"Well, it's kinda difficult to schedule an appointment without a first name."
"Well, they told me I needed to pick a pediatrician before the baby was born. So, I was just calling to set up my child as a patient."
"Well, ...we do getting acquainted visits with new parents before the baby is born."
"I guess that's what I need then, huh?"
"Ok, ...well it looks like you already have an appointment with another doctor tomorrow at 5pm."
"Ummm, no. We haven't made any other appointments."
"It says so right here."
"This is the first time we've called here."
"I spoke to your wife on the 1st. She called and made an appointment. So, you want me to cancel this one?"
"I'm telling you the honest truth. We have not called there. That appointment was obviously made for someone else and accidentally placed in our file, so I don't think you should delete it."
tap-tap-tap
"I took care of it."

How do I know that was the sound of an appointment being deleted. I almost want to be there at 5pm tomorrow when someone comes in for their now-deleted appointment. Then I can jump out and say "HA! I TOLD YOU SO!"

1:31 PM

Andrew Rocks

Once again able to keep down his kippers, Andrew rocks the Howell Raines Gaurdian piece.

If you want a good look at why the information you get from the major newspapers and networks is often wrong, read it.

As an example, ...remember all the moaning about the horrible Bush economy? Remember all those disingenuous commercials run by Kerry and his cohorts? Remember all the doom and gloom? Remember the "jobless recovery" canard that suggested people with high paying jobs were being forced to take jobs "flipping burgers"?

The truth about the economy was not hard to see, but many still got the "impression" that things were getting worse rather than getting better.

It's only a few short months later and we are seeing nearly daily stories like this.

"Right now, our biggest problem is finding qualified people," said Larson, plant manager at Milwaukee N/C Machining in Fredonia.

This isn't an isolated story. At the rate people are leaving my company for new jobs, ...the recovery is here, it is real, and it is just as we said it would be.

11:48 AM